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  • “Happiness is a journey, not a destination”

    “Happiness is a journey, not a destination”

    One of my favorite life quotes and words to live by, this is something we all need to be reminded of from time to time.

    I’m at the age where girls are starting to either get serious with their relationships, get out of them, or get scared of the lack thereof (🙋). And we’re all guilty of putting that time clock on getting married or having kids (i.e., “if I’m not married by 30, I’m giving up”). I’m not going to lie, I’ve made pacts with friends that we’d adopt children if we were still single at a certain age, and I recently told my family that I’m buying a dog at 27 if I’m still single (AKA setting myself up for success). But in all seriousness, there is no time clock ever needed on life, and these “deadlines” we’re setting need to stop.

    Though we all want that knight in shining armor, a woman’s success and happiness is sure as hell not defined by having a man. And that life we all yearn for (a hot guy, kids, dog, and a house per say), is going to happen eventually. But that “dream life” is not going to be perfect, and shouldn’t be the only thing that’s going to make you happy.

    Being present, loving yourself and your life for what it is now – this is what will bring you happiness today. And if you’re not content, then do something to change that immediately – whether that’s changing jobs, getting out of shitty relationships, or picking up a new hobby.

    There is no time clock or “end in sight” when it comes to achieving happiness, and that’s because it’s a constant journey that we’re all on day in and day out. Don’t get me wrong, everyday is not going to be rainbows and butterflies, and we all have tough times. But how you come out of those situations and how you face life everyday – that is up to you.

    Yes, I am single as a pringle and there is literally no love interest in sight. But that doesn’t define me. I define me. And someday, I will find my perfect guy. But until then, I’m working on one of the most important loves: the one with myself.

    Take a moment today to be thankful for your amazing body, your wonderful friends and family who give you constant love and support, your beautiful self and your beautiful life. Because it’s your choice to make it a happy one, today and everyday.

    Keepin’ it short and sweet this Sunday, peeps. Now go kick some ass 😎

  • A Random Mistook Me For Amy Schumer, And I Liked It

    A Random Mistook Me For Amy Schumer, And I Liked It

    The other day, I was sitting on the bus on my way home from work, when a woman sat down next to me and said, “Do you ever get that you look like Amy Schumer?!” I snickered, “No,” and she goes, “Wow, I literally thought I was sitting next to her!”

    So, of course, I was immediately flattered. And that’s because Amy Schumer’s freaking awesome – not only is she absolutely hilarious, but she’s making epic moves in the body image movement (and is gorg).

    If you’re unfamiliar, earlier this year, Amy did a photo shoot for Glamour Magazine. But to her surprise, when the magazine came out with the issue, she was featured as plus size. Schumer says Glamour did this without her permission, and included her in their special plus size issue in collaboration with Lane Bryant.

    Here’s how Amy responded on Instagram: “I think there’s nothing wrong with being plus size. Beautiful healthy women. Plus size is considered size 16 in America. I go between a size 6 and 8… @glamourmag put me in their plus size only issue without asking or letting me know and it doesn’t feel right to me. Young girls seeing my body type and thinking that’s plus size? What are your thoughts? Mine are not cool glamour not glamorous.”

    Overall, I think she handled it well. She’s standing up for “plus size” women, while also defending her shape. I get it – it’s definitely not cool of Glamour.

    But you know what’s also not cool? The term plus size. Like Ashley Graham says, “I think the term plus size is outdated. It shouldn’t be about labels.” I think you’re damn right, Graham. The labels need to end. And the fact that Amy Schumer was offended is offensive in itself. Size is just a damn size, it doesn’t mean shit.

    I used to get all hung up on the size of clothes I was buying. I was embarrassed and ashamed, and could barely look at the sizes I was pulling off the rack. But then one day recently, I shit you not, I all of a sudden got so proud of my size. Why? Because the clothes I’m buying make me look amazing, beautiful and make me feel good, and it doesn’t matter that they’re not a “small” or “zero.” They’re MY size, no one else’s.

    Amy Schumer defending her size is okay, but she shouldn’t have to. No one should be labeled. But in today’s world, we all are, especially celebrities. Being scrutinized for your weight in the public eye would be nothing close to easy, and she handles it well.

    Unfortunately Amy has struggled with body image before, and this wasn’t her first run in with these kinds of issues. “It’s an emotional thing,” she told TODAY in a recent interview. “It’s been a struggle for me my whole life, and especially just being in the entertainment industry. Standing on a stage in front of people, I can’t perform my best or be confident if I’m not sure — if I’m pulling at something [I’m wearing]. And sometimes I would just want to throw in the towel and be like, ‘I’m not gonna go do standup tonight.’”

    It took meeting a stylist, Leesa Evans, on the set of her movie Trainwreck to turn her outlook around. She said before Leesa, she always dressed poorly and didn’t feel nearly as good in her clothes before. And that inspired her to help women find their style, and is why she teamed up with Goodwill of Southern California to educate and inspire women through fashion.

    Ultimately, Schumer says her goal across the board with everything is to “make everybody laugh and feel better.” And that’s where I want to end. I’m damn proud to be told I look like Amy Schumer, because she’s beautiful, empowering and making a point to be proud of her body. Not only that, she’s trying to help women be proud of theirs, and open about her own issues with body insecurity. That’s inspiring in itself.

    So random lady on the bus, thank you. Amy is beautiful, hilarious, and I’ll take your doppelganger comment and run.

    Photo credit: torbakhopper

  • Miss Teen USA Cutting Swimsuit Competition

    Miss Teen USA Cutting Swimsuit Competition

    It was recently reported that the 51 women who will compete in future Miss Teen USA pageants will no longer do a swimsuit competition – this portion of the competition would be replaced by a brand new athletic wear competition.

    Well, thank goodness. Because I’m sorry, but what 14 to 19 year old needs a bunch of judges (and Americans watching TV) judging their bodies in swimsuits? They’ve barely even grown into themselves! I understand these women are physically fit, but there’s no reason in hell that they should be baring it all for judges and viewers. They’re as young as FOURTEEN, people.

    Athletic gear is a much more normal, realistic way of displaying their healthy physiques (and not to mention, much less revealing for girls 19 and under). And apparently, Julianne Hough, host and creative producer for this year’s Miss USA (where contestants range from ages 18 to 28), has considered removing swimsuits from these competitions altogether. Even though that’s years in the making and I’d most definitely applaud it, I’m happy that it’s at least happening with the Teen USA pageant for now.

    I get that that the swimsuit competition is a pertinent component of these things (eh, I guess I get it), but in what universe is parading around in glorified underwear normal? Oh wait, in our world it is. Cue the Victoria’s Secret fashion show with almost-naked women parading around in freaking angel wings. Sigh.

    Miss USA, Miss Universe, and all of these different pageants do a lot of great things for women: Candidates often say they feel empowered and encouraged to follow their dreams and the competitions often support great causes.

    But, in the same token, I disagree that women should be baring it all for the stage. There’s no need to imply to viewers that six-pack abs and perfectly toned thighs are what’s necessary to be beautiful. Those characteristics are not reality for a majority of the world’s women. Let’s not forget that the average American woman is 5‘4” and 166 pounds. So no, this is not reality to most.

    I’ve known super respectable and amazing women who have participated in pageants, and ladies, I am not putting you down. What I’m doing is giving all the viewers out there a reality check that it’s okay if you don’t look like this. And teens, please hold onto your innocence for as long as you can, and avoid skimpy swimsuits for a while (no, your dads didn’t pay me to write that).

    To those watching these competitions and runway-type shows, let’s take the pressure off ourselves. And ladies who competed in this year’s Teen USA pageant – remember that athletic wear is a perfectly fine way to present your strong, amazing self. As former Miss Virginia said, “This is focusing on what bodies can do, not just what they look like.”

    Preach sister, preach. That is a wrap. Congratulations to Miss Teen USA for this positive change in the body image movement. There’s still work to do, but it’s a start.

    Photo credit: Josue Goge

  • Dwyane Wade on ESPN’s Body Issue

    Dwyane Wade on ESPN’s Body Issue

    Recently, I came across an issue of ESPN Magazine that caught me a little off guard – in a good way. The reason? Dwyane Wade was naked. Yep, naked. I wasn’t aware of ESPN’s ‘Body Issue’ before (even though it’s been around since 2009!), but I’m sure as hell a fan now (and not for the reasons you’d think). First of all, if you haven’t read the article, you should read it.

    In short, Dwyane Wade explains how he’s rejected all of the past offers to be featured in the Body Issue (he was asked for the past seven years to be exact), because he really wasn’t comfortable with his body until very recently. Ever since he was a kid, he’d been self-conscious about his “outie” belly button and has had other body insecurity issues. I know he doesn’t look it, but he’s 34 now—which is why it’s so interesting that this year he agreed to being naked for the issue. And he’s revealing more than his body—he’s talking a lot about his insecurities and body confidence.

    This couldn’t be more relevant now that Dwyane is officially a Chicago Bull as well as a proud native Chicagoan (my hometown team–I’m so excited!). Dwyane sheds light on the important fact that EVERYONE, even guys and even famous people and even professional athletes, have body image issues. I’m so proud of him for admitting this in such an inspiring way. He even says in the article that people would probably be surprised by the fact that he’s insecure because of who he is.

    But the reality, people, is that literally everyone goes through things like this. I don’t care who you are, how thin, how famous, there are going to be times when you are insecure and self-conscious in some way or another (and I hate that so much, but it’s true).

    But here’s the other thing: That’s perfectly okay. Because eventually, like Dwyane Wade, you’ll come to terms with yourself and be confident with your body and feel comfortable showing it naked. Dwyane is now THIRTY-FOUR and he just said he recently got comfortable in his skin, even in front of his wife. That is epic stuff. And not because he’s insecure, I don’t wish that upon anyone, but because he’s being honest and has gone through something the everyday person has.

    I don’t think I’m the only one who has ever thought, “Oh wow, that celebrity [insert hot Victoria’s Secret Model] is so hot, I want to look just like her. She’s perfect.” But in reality, they’re real people too. They have their own insecurities, and it’s important to acknowledge that.

    This also goes back to my huge belief that wishing you were something else, wishing you looked like someone else, wishing you were thinner, etc. will get you absolutely nowhere. What happens when I become as hot as Adriana Lima? I still have the same shit going on in my life, I still have obstacles, and my life won’t just whip itself into perfectness. And that’s why we all have to keep believing that we are perfect the way we are.

    Kudos to you, Dwyane Wade, for opening this issue up to not only men, but professional athletes, celebrities and everyone else out there who is affected by this in some way (I know I am). It shows that we all have things to work on and hardships to get over, and it doesn’t matter who you are or what you look like, you still have shit going on.

    With that, I warmly welcome you to Chicago, Dwyane, and am proud to call you one of the Bullie Wullies!

    Photo credit: Keith Allison

     

     

  • Intro: The Curve Confessions

    Intro: The Curve Confessions

    First things first, thanks for visiting the Curve Confessions! Before diving into my posts, I wanted to explain why I created this blog.

    My entire life, I’ve struggled with poor body image (definition: the subjective picture or mental image of one’s own body). From a young age, I was bullied for being fat, and from that point forward, my perception of my body has almost always been negative. I’ve also witnessed countless incidences of other people’s bodies being criticized (from friends to celebrities). Some of that criticizing is done by other people, some of it is done by themselves.

    With obsession over Hollywood celebrity bodies and the media’s focus on people’s figures (women especially), this issue is getting bigger and bigger. There isn’t a voice out there advocating for and discussing body image in an honest and open way. That’s where the Curve Confessions comes in.

    I want to be a voice among the curves, empowering people everywhere who feel insecure about their bodies, who have witnessed someone else’s insecurity or issues, or simply who think it’s an important issue that needs to be addressed. And I don’t just speak for ‘curvy’ women, I am an advocate for all shapes and sizes (though I do consider myself curvy :)).

    Body shaming is defined as inappropriate negative statements made towards someone about their weight or size, and it happens to men and women everywhere. Honestly, we don’t even realize the extent we’re doing it. Passing judgment of someone on the street, talking about a celebrity who has lost or gained weight, thinking a negative comment to yourself when you’re about to get into the shower – these are all examples of negative body image and body shaming.

    There are so many stories to dig into around this topic and the Curve Confessions is my outlet to do just that. If you’re looking for inspiration, a laugh, a pick-me-up, or just simply a good read, you’ve come to the right place.

    But body image to me isn’t just physical, it’s mental. Mental health is so important, and is half the battle when it comes to how you see yourself in the mirror (and how you see others). To those who want to focus on keeping their mind in the right place, and are seeking solid advice to do so, you’ve also come to the right place.

    I want to be clear that nobody is perfect – we all make negative comments and wish to look a certain way at times. But it’s time to work together to start accepting ourselves for the way we are, and being happy and supportive of others in their own body journeys. We can always make changes for our health, our happiness, or any other reason we might have, but there’s no reason to talk down to everyone’s most precious and unique gift: their body.

    The conversation around body image is an important one to be had – it’s a part of our everyday lives and something that can, and should, be addressed. I love to write and I love empowering people – so I’ve put a lot of thought into the Curve Confessions. I hope it’s a blog you continually visit and find purpose in, whatever that purpose may be.

    Just remember a few things about your body… It’s yours. It’s unique. It’s worth worshiping.

    Thanks again for visiting – now read on and enjoy the Curve Confessions! Also follow along to see my posts on Instagram, @thecurveconfessions.

    -KP (creator of the Curve Confessions)